Justine 淑女的眼泪 Chapter 54

And then I rush back to Dubreuil's room; I am not allowed to approach his bedside. "But why?" I demand and am given the reason: the poor man is expiring and is no longer occupied with anyone save his God. However, he exonerates¹ me, he gives assurance of my innocence²; he expressly forbids that I be pursued; he dies. Hardly has he closed his eyes when his associate hastens to bring me the news and begs me to be easy. Alas³ I how could I be? how was I not to weep bitterly for the loss of a man who had so generously offered to extricate⁴ me from misery⁵! how was I not to deplore⁶ a theft which forced me back into the wretchedness whence I had only a moment before emerged! Frightful⁸ creature! I cried; if 'tis to this your principles lead you, is it any wonder they are abhorred⁹ and that honest folk punish them! But I was arguing from the injured party's viewpoint and Dubois, who had only reaped happiness therefrom and saw nothing but her interest in what she had undertaken, Dubois, I say, had doubtless reached a very different conclusion.

 

To Dubreuil's associate, whose name was Valbois, I divulged¹⁰ everything, both what had been concerted against the man we had lost and what had happened to me. He sympathized with me, most sincerely regretted Dubreuil and blamed the overly nice scruples¹¹ which had prevented me from lodging¹² a complaint instantly I had been advised of Dubois' schemes; we agreed that this monster who needed but four hours to get to another country and security would arrive there before we would be able to organize her pursuit, that to follow her would involve considerable expense, that the inn-keeper, heavily compromised by the proceedings¹³ we would launch, by defending himself with vehemence¹⁴ might perhaps end by having me crushed, I... who seemed to be living in Grenoble as one who had missed the gallows¹⁵ by a hairsbreadth. These reasons convinced me and even terrified me to the point I resolved to leave the town without even saying farewell to my protector, Monsieur S * * *. Dubreuil's friend approved the idea; he did not conceal¹⁶ from me that if the entire adventure were to be revealed he would be obliged to make depositions¹⁷ which, his precautions notwithstanding, would involve me as much by my intimacy¹⁸ with Dubreuil as in reason of my last outing with his friend; in the light of which he urged me to leave at once without a word to anyone, and I could be perfectly¹⁹ sure that, on his side, he would never take steps against me, whom he believed innocent, and, in all that had just occurred, whom he could only accuse of weakness.

 

Upon pondering Valbois' opinions, I recognized they were that much better the more certain it appeared I would be beheld²⁰ with suspicion; the less my guilt²¹, the wiser his suggestions; the one thing that spoke²² in my behalf, the recommendation I had made to Dubreuil at the outset of our promenade²³, which had, so they told me, been unsatisfactorily explained by the article of his death, would not appear so conclusive²⁴ as I might hope; whereupon I promptly²⁵ made my decision; I imparted it to Valbois.

 

"Would," said he, "that my friend had charged me with some dispositions²⁷ favorable to you, I should carry out such requests with the greatest pleasure; I am sorry indeed he did not tell me 'twas to you he owed the advice to guard his room; but he said nothing of the sort, not a word did I have from him, and consequently I am obliged to limit myself to merely complying with his orders. What you have suffered by his loss would persuade me to do something in my own name were I able to, Mademoiselle, but I am just setting up in business, I am young, my fortune is not boundless²⁸, I am compelled to render an account of Dubreuil to his family and without delay; allow me then to confine myself to the one little service I beg you to accept: here are five louis and I have here as well an honest merchant from Chalon-sur-Saone, my native city; she is going to return there after a day and a night's stop at Lyon where she is called by business matters; I put you into her keeping."

 

"Madame Bertrand," Valbois continued, "here is the young lady I spoke of; I recommend her to you, she wishes to procure²⁹ herself a situation. With the same earnestness which would apply were she my own sister, I beg you to take all possible steps to find something in our city which will be suitable to her person, her birth, and her upbringing; that until she is properly installed she incur³⁰ no expense; do see to her requirements and I shall reimburse³¹ you immediately I am home."

 

Valbois besought³² me leave to embrace me. "Adieu, Mademoiselle," he continued, "Madame Bertrand sets off tomorrow at daybreak; accompany her and may a little more happiness attend you in a city where I shall perhaps soon have the satisfaction of seeing you again."

 

The courtesy of this young man, who was in no sort indebted to me, brought tears to my eyes. Kind treatment is sweet indeed when for so long one has experienced naught³³ but the most odious³⁴. I accepted his gifts, at the same time swearing I was going to work at nothing but to put myself in a way to be able someday to reciprocate³⁵. Alas! I thought as I retired³⁶, though the exercise of yet another virtue³⁷ has just flung me into destitution³⁸, at least, for the first time in my life, the hope of consolation³⁹ looms⁴⁰ out of this appalling⁴¹ pit of evil into which Virtue has cast me again.

 

The hour was not advanced; I needed a breath of air and so went down to the Isere embankment, desiring to stroll there for several instants; and, as almost always happens under similar circumstances, my thoughts, absorbing me entirely⁴², led me far. Finding myself, at length, in an isolated⁴³ place, I sat down, more leisurely⁴⁴ to ponder. However, night descended⁴⁵ before I thought to return; of a sudden I felt myself seized by three men: one clapped a hand over my mouth, the other two precipitated⁴⁶ me into a carriage, climbed in, and for three full hours we sped along, during which time not one of these brigands⁴⁷ deigned⁴⁸ either to say a word to me or respond to any of my questions. The blinds were drawn⁴⁹ down, I saw nothing; the carriage came to a halt before a house, gates swung wide, we entered, the gates clanged to immediately. My abductors pick me up, lead me through several unlit apartments, and finally leave me in one near which is a room wherein I perceive a light.

 

"Stay here," says one of my ravishers as he withdraws with his companions, "you're soon going to see an old acquaintance."

 

And they disappear, carefully shutting all the doors. At almost the same time, that leading into the room where I had spied illumination is opened, and carrying a candle in her hand, I see emerge... oh, Madame, fancy who it was... Dubois... Dubois herself, that frightful monster, devoured⁵⁰, no question of it, by the most ardent⁵¹ desire to be revenged.

 

"Hither, charming girl," said she in an arrogant⁵² tone, "come here and receive the reward for the virtues⁵³ in which you indulged yourself at my expense..." And angrily clutching my hand: "...ah, you wretch⁷ I I'll teach you to betray me!"

 

"No, Madame, no," I say in great haste, " I betrayed you not at all: inform yourself: I uttered not one word which could cause you any inquietude, no, I spoke not the least word which might compromise you."

 

"But did you not offer resistance to the crime I meditated⁵⁴? have you not thwarted⁵⁵ its execution, worthless creature! You've got to be chastened...."

 

And, as we were entering, she had no time to say more. The apartment into which I was made to pass was lit with equal sumptuousness⁵⁶ and magnificence; at the further end, reclining upon an ottoman, was a man of about forty, wearing a billowing taffeta dressing⁵⁷ robe.

 

"Monseigneur," said Dubois, presenting me to him, "here is the young lady you wanted, she in whom all Grenoble has become interested... the celebrated⁵⁸ Therese, to be brief, condemned⁵⁹ to hang with the counterfeiters, then delivered thanks to her innocence and her virtue. Acknowledge that I serve you with skill, Monseigneur; not four days ago you evinced your extreme desire to immolate⁶⁰ her to your passions; and today I put her into your hands; you will perhaps prefer her to that pretty little pensionnaire from the Benedictine convent at Lyon you also desired and who should be arriving any minute: the latter has her physical and moral integrity this one here has nothing but a sentimental⁶¹ chastity; but it is deep-grained in her being and nowhere will you find a creature more heavily ballasted with candor⁶² and honesty. They are both at your disposition²⁶, Monseigneur: you'll either dispatch each this evening, or one today and the other tomorrow. As for myself, I am leaving you: your kindnesses in my regard engaged me to make you privy⁶³ to my Grenoble adventure. One man dead, Monseigneur, one dead man; I must fly "

 

"Ah no, no, charming woman!" cried the master of the place; "no, stay, and fear nothing while you have my protection! You are as a soul unto my pleasures; you alone possess the art of exciting and satisfying them, and the more you multiply your crimes, the more the thought of you inflames⁶⁴ my mind.... But this Therese is a pretty thing...." and addressing himself to me: "what is your age, my child?"

 

"Twenty-six, Monseigneur," I replied, "and much grief."

 

"Ha, yes, grief indeed, lots of distress⁶⁵, excellent, I'm familiar with all that, hugely amusing, just what I like; we're going to straighten everything out, we'll put a stop to these tumbles; I guarantee you that in twenty-four hours you'll be unhappy no longer, ha!..." and, with that, dreadful flights of laughter... " 'tis true, eh, Dubois? I've a sure method for ending a young girl's misfortunes, haven't I?"

 

"Indeed you do," the odious creature replied; "and if Therese weren't a friend of mine, I'd never have brought her to you; but it is only fair I reward her for what she did for me. You'd never imagine how useful this dear thing was to me during my latest enterprise at Grenoble; you, Monseigneur, have had the kindness to accept my expression of gratitude⁶⁶, and, I pray you, repay what I owe her with interest."

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