Work: A Story of Experience - Chapter 7
时间：2021-01-24 02:26:08
（单词翻译:单击）
THE year that followed was the saddest Christie had ever known, for she suffered a sort of poverty which is more difficult to bear than actual want, since money cannot lighten it, and the rarest charity alone can minister to it. Her heart was empty and she could not fill it; her soul was hungry and she could not feed it; life was cold and dark and she could not warm and brighten it, for she knew not where to go.
She tried to help herself by all the means in her power, and when effort after effort failed she said: "I am not good enough yet to deserve happiness. I think too much of human love, too little of divine. When I have made God my friend perhaps He will let me find and keep one heart to make life happy with. How shall I know God? Who will tell me where to find Him, and help me to love and lean upon Him as I ought?"
In all sincerity1 she asked these questions, in all sincerity she began her search, and with pathetic patience waited for an answer. She read many books, some wise, some vague, some full of superstition2, all unsatisfactory to one who wanted a living God. She went to many churches, studied many creeds4, and watched their fruits as well as she could; but still remained unsatisfied. Some were cold and narrow, some seemed theatrical5 and superficial, some stern and terrible, none simple, sweet, and strong enough for humanity's many needs. There was too much machinery6, too many walls, laws, and penalties between the Father and His children. Too much fear, too little love; too many saints and intercessors; too little faith in the instincts of the soul which turns to God as flowers to the sun. Too much idle strife8 about names and creeds; too little knowledge of the natural religion which has no name but godliness, whose creed3 is boundless9 and benignant as the sunshine, whose faith is as the tender trust of little children in their mother's love.
Nowhere did Christie find this all-sustaining power, this paternal10 friend, and comforter, and after months of patient searching she gave up her quest, saying, despondently11:
"I'm afraid I never shall get religion, for all that's offered me seems so poor, so narrow, or so hard that I cannot take it for my stay. A God of wrath12 I cannot love; a God that must be propitiated13, adorned14, and adored like an idol15 I cannot respect; and a God who can be blinded to men's iniquities16 through the week by a little beating of the breast and bowing down on the seventh day, I cannot serve. I want a Father to whom I can go with all my sins and sorrows, all my hopes and joys, as freely and fearlessly as I used to go to my human father, sure of help and sympathy and love. Shall I ever find Him?"
Alas17, poor Christie! she was going through the sorrowful perplexity that comes to so many before they learn that religion cannot be given or bought, but must grow as trees grow, needing frost and snow, rain and wind to strengthen it before it is deep-rooted in the soul; that God is in the hearts of all, and they that seek shall surely find Him when they need Him most.
So Christie waited for religion to reveal itself to her, and while she waited worked with an almost desperate industry, trying to buy a little happiness for herself by giving a part of her earnings18 to those whose needs money could supply. She clung to her little room, for there she could live her own life undisturbed, and preferred to stint19 herself in other ways rather than give up this liberty. Day after day she sat there sewing health of mind and body into the long seams or dainty stitching that passed through her busy hands, and while she sewed she thought sad, bitter, oftentimes rebellious20 thoughts.
It was the worst life she could have led just then, for, deprived of the active, cheerful influences she most needed, her mind preyed21 on itself, slowly and surely, preparing her for the dark experience to come. She knew that there was fitter work for her somewhere, but how to find it was a problem which wiser women have often failed to solve. She was no pauper22, yet was one of those whom poverty sets at odds23 with the world, for favors burden and dependence24 makes the bread bitter unless love brightens the one and sweetens the other.
There are many Christies, willing to work, yet unable to bear the contact with coarser natures which makes labor26 seem degrading, or to endure the hard struggle for the bare necessities of life when life has lost all that makes it beautiful. People wonder when such as she say they can find little to do; but to those who know nothing of the pangs27 of pride, the sacrifices of feeling, the martyrdoms of youth, love, hope, and ambition that go on under the faded cloaks of these poor gentle-women, who tell them to go into factories, or scrub in kitchens, for there is work enough for all, the most convincing answer would be, "Try it."
Christie kept up bravely till a wearisome low fever broke both strength and spirit, and brought the weight of debt upon her when least fitted to bear or cast it off. For the first time she began to feel that she had nerves which would rebel, and a heart that could not long endure isolation28 from its kind without losing the cheerful courage which hitherto had been her staunchest friend. Perfect rest, kind care, and genial29 society were the medicines she needed, but there was no one to minister to her, and she went blindly on along the road so many women tread.
She left her bed too soon, fearing to ask too much of the busy people who had done their best to be neighborly. She returned to her work when it felt heavy in her feeble hands, for debt made idleness seem wicked to her conscientious30 mind. And, worst of all, she fell back into the bitter, brooding mood which had become habitual31 to her since she lived alone. While the tired hands slowly worked, the weary brain ached and burned with heavy thoughts, vain longings32, and feverish34 fancies, till things about her sometimes seemed as strange and spectral35 as the phantoms36 that had haunted her half-delirious sleep. Inexpressibly wretched were the dreary38 days, the restless nights, with only pain and labor for companions. The world looked very dark to her, life seemed an utter failure, God a delusion39, and the long, lonely years before her too hard to be endured.
It is not always want, insanity40, or sin that drives women to desperate deaths; often it is a dreadful loneliness of heart, a hunger for home and friends, worse than starvation, a bitter sense of wrong in being denied the tender ties, the pleasant duties, the sweet rewards that can make the humblest life happy; a rebellious protest against God, who, when they cry for bread, seems to offer them a stone. Some of these impatient souls throw life away, and learn too late how rich it might have been with a stronger faith, a more submissive spirit. Others are kept, and slowly taught to stand and wait, till blest with a happiness the sweeter for the doubt that went before.
There came a time to Christie when the mist about her was so thick she would have stumbled and fallen had not the little candle, kept alight by her own hand, showed her how far "a good deed shines in a naughty world;" and when God seemed utterly42 forgetful of her He sent a friend to save and comfort her.
March winds were whistling among the house-tops, and the sky was darkening with a rainy twilight43 as Christie folded up her finished work, stretched her weary limbs, and made ready for her daily walk. Even this was turned to profit, for then she took home her work, went in search of more, and did her own small marketing44. As late hours and unhealthy labor destroyed appetite, and unpaid45 debts made each mouthful difficult to swallow with Mrs. Flint's hard eye upon her, she had undertaken to supply her own food, and so lessen46 the obligation that burdened her. An unwise retrenchment47, for, busied with the tasks that must be done, she too often neglected or deferred48 the meals to which no society lent interest, no appetite gave flavor; and when the fuel was withheld49 the fire began to die out spark by spark.
As she stood before the little mirror, smoothing the hair upon her forehead, she watched the face reflected there, wondering if it could be the same she used to see so full of youth and hope and energy.
"Yes, I'm growing old; my youth is nearly over, and at thirty I shall be a faded, dreary woman, like so many I see and pity. It's hard to come to this after trying so long to find my place, and do my duty. I'm a failure after all, and might as well have stayed with Aunt Betsey or married Joe."
"Miss Devon, to-day is Saturday, and I'm makin' up my bills, so I'll trouble you for your month's board, and as much on the old account as you can let me have."
Mrs. Flint spoke50, and her sharp voice rasped the silence like a file, for she had entered without knocking, and her demand was the first intimation of her presence.
Christie turned slowly round, for there was no elasticity51 in her motions now; through the melancholy52 anxiety her face always wore of late, there came the worried look of one driven almost beyond endurance, and her hands began to tremble nervously53 as she tied on her bonnet54. Mrs. Flint was a hard woman, and dunned her debtors55 relentlessly56; Christie dreaded57 the sight of her, and would have left the house had she been free of debt.
"I am just going to take these things home and get more work. I am sure of being paid, and you shall have all I get. But, for Heaven's sake, give me time."
Two days and a night of almost uninterrupted labor had given a severe strain to her nerves, and left her in a dangerous state. Something in her face arrested Mrs. Flint's attention; she observed that Christie was putting on her best cloak and hat, and to her suspicious eye the bundle of work looked unduly58 large.
It had been a hard day for the poor woman, for the cook had gone off in a huff; the chamber59 girl been detected in petty larceny60; two desirable boarders had disappointed her; and the incapable61 husband had fallen ill, so it was little wonder that her soul was tried, her sharp voice sharper, and her sour temper sourer than ever.
"I have heard of folks putting on their best things and going out, but never coming back again, when they owed money. It's a mean trick, but it's sometimes done by them you wouldn't think it of," she said, with an aggravating62 sniff63 of intelligence.
To be suspected of dishonesty was the last drop in Christie's full cup. She looked at the woman with a strong desire to do something violent, for every nerve was tingling64 with irritation65 and anger. But she controlled herself, though her face was colorless and her hands were more tremulous than before. Unfastening her comfortable cloak she replaced it with a shabby shawl; took off her neat bonnet and put on a hood66, unfolded six linen67 shirts, and shook them out before her landlady's eyes; then retied the parcel, and, pausing on the threshold of the door, looked back with an expression that haunted the woman long afterward68, as she said, with the quiver of strong excitement in her voice:
"Mrs. Flint, I have always dealt honorably by you; I always mean to do it, and don't deserve to be suspected of dishonesty like that. I leave every thing I own behind me, and if I don't come back, you can sell them all and pay yourself, for I feel now as if I never wanted to see you or this room again."
Then she went rapidly away, supported by her indignation, for she had done her best to pay her debts; had sold the few trinkets she possessed69, and several treasures given by the Carrols, to settle her doctor's bill, and had been half killing70 herself to satisfy Mrs. Flint's demands. The consciousness that she had been too lavish71 in her generosity72 when fortune smiled upon her, made the present want all the harder to bear. But she would neither beg nor borrow, though she knew Harry73 would delight to give, and Uncle Enos lend her money, with a lecture on extravagance, gratis74.
"I'll paddle my own canoe as long as I can," she said, sternly; "and when I must ask help I'll turn to strangers for it, or scuttle75 my boat, and go down without troubling any one."
When she came to her employer's door, the servant said: "Missis was out;" then seeing Christie's disappointed face, she added, confidentially77:
"If it's any comfort to know it, I can tell you that missis wouldn't have paid you if she had a been to home. There's been three other women here with work, and she's put 'em all off. She always does, and beats 'em down into the bargain, which ain't genteel to my thinkin'."
"She promised me I should be well paid for these, because I undertook to get them done without fail. I've worked day and night rather than disappoint her, and felt sure of my money," said Christie, despondently.
"I'm sorry, but you won't get it. She told me to tell you your prices was too high, and she could find folks to work cheaper."
"She did not object to the price when I took the work, and I have half-ruined my eyes over the fine stitching. See if it isn't nicely done." And Christie displayed her exquisite78 needlework with pride.
The girl admired it, and, having a grievance80 of her own, took satisfaction in berating81 her mistress.
"It's a shame! These things are part of a present, the ladies are going to give the minister; but I don't believe he'll feel easy in 'em if poor folks is wronged to get 'em. Missis won't pay what they are worth, I know; for, don't you see, the cheaper the work is done, the more money she has to make a spread with her share of the present? It's my opinion you'd better hold on to these shirts till she pays for 'em handsome."
"No; I'll keep my promise, and I hope she will keep hers. Tell her I need the money very much, and have worked very hard to please her. I'll come again on Monday, if I'm able."
Christie's lips trembled as she spoke, for she was feeble still, and the thought of that hard-earned money had been her sustaining hope through the weary hours spent over that ill-paid work. The girl said "Good-bye," with a look of mingled83 pity and respect, for in her eyes the seamstress was more of a lady than the mistress in this transaction.
Christie hurried to another place, and asked eagerly if the young ladies had any work for her. "Not a stitch," was the reply, and the door closed. She stood a moment looking down upon the passers-by wondering what answer she would get if she accosted84 any one; and had any especially benevolent85 face looked back at her she would have been tempted86 to do it, so heart-sick and forlorn did she feel just then.
She knocked at several other doors, to receive the same reply. She even tried a slop-shop, but it was full, and her pale face was against her. Her long illness had lost her many patrons, and if one steps out from the ranks of needle-women, it is very hard to press in again, so crowded are they, and so desperate the need of money.
One hope remained, and, though the way was long, and a foggy drizzle87 had set in, she minded neither distance nor the chilly88 rain, but hurried away with anxious thoughts still dogging her steps. Across a long bridge, through muddy roads and up a stately avenue she went, pausing, at last, spent and breathless at another door.
A servant with a wedding-favor in his button-hole opened to her, and, while he went to deliver her urgent message, she peered in wistfully from the dreary world without, catching89 glimpses of home-love and happiness that made her heart ache for very pity of its own loneliness. A wedding was evidently afoot, for hall and staircase blazed with light and bloomed with flowers. Smiling men and maids ran to and fro; opening doors showed tables beautiful with bridal white and silver; savory90 odors filled the air; gay voices echoed above and below; and once she caught a brief glance at the bonny bride, standing91 with her father's arm about her, while her mother gave some last, loving touch to her array; and a group of young sisters with April faces clustered round her.
The pretty picture vanished all too soon; the man returned with a hurried "No" for answer, and Christie went out into the deepening twilight with a strange sense of desperation at her heart. It was not the refusal, not the fear of want, nor the reaction of overtaxed nerves alone; it was the sharpness of the contrast between that other woman's fate and her own that made her wring92 her hands together, and cry out, bitterly:
"Oh, it isn't fair, it isn't right, that she should have so much and I so little! What have I ever done to be so desolate93 and miserable94, and never to find any happiness, however hard I try to do what seems my duty?"
There was no answer, and she went slowly down the long avenue, feeling that there was no cause for hurry now, and even night and rain and wind were better than her lonely room or Mrs. Flint's complaints. Afar off the city lights shone faintly through the fog, like pale lamps seen in dreams; the damp air cooled her feverish cheeks; the road was dark and still, and she longed to lie down and rest among the sodden95 leaves.
When she reached the bridge she saw the draw was up, and a spectral ship was slowly passing through. With no desire to mingle82 in the crowd that waited on either side, she paused, and, leaning on the railing, let her thoughts wander where they would. As she stood there the heavy air seemed to clog96 her breath and wrap her in its chilly arms. She felt as if the springs of life were running down, and presently would stop; for, even when the old question, "What shall I do?" came haunting her, she no longer cared even to try to answer it, and had no feeling but one of utter weariness. She tried to shake off the strange mood that was stealing over her, but spent body and spent brain were not strong enough to obey her will, and, in spite of her efforts to control it, the impulse that had seized her grew more intense each moment.
"Why should I work and suffer any longer for myself alone?" she thought; "why wear out my life struggling for the bread I have no heart to eat? I am not wise enough to find my place, nor patient enough to wait until it comes to me. Better give up trying, and leave room for those who have something to live for."
Many a stronger soul has known a dark hour when the importunate97 wish has risen that it were possible and right to lay down the burdens that oppress, the perplexities that harass98, and hasten the coming of the long sleep that needs no lullaby. Such an hour was this to Christie, for, as she stood there, that sorrowful bewilderment which we call despair came over her, and ruled her with a power she could not resist.
A flight of steps close by led to a lumber99 wharf100, and, scarcely knowing why, she went down there, with a vague desire to sit still somewhere, and think her way out of the mist that seemed to obscure her mind. A single tall lamp shone at the farther end of the platform, and presently she found herself leaning her hot forehead against the iron pillar, while she watched with curious interest the black water rolling sluggishly101 below.
She knew it was no place for her, yet no one waited for her, no one would care if she staid for ever, and, yielding to the perilous102 fascination103 that drew her there, she lingered with a heavy throbbing104 in her temples, and a troop of wild fancies whirling through her brain. Something white swept by below, - only a broken oar25 - but she began to wonder how a human body would look floating through the night. It was an awesome105 fancy, but it took possession of her, and, as it grew, her eyes dilated106, her breath came fast, and her lips fell apart, for she seemed to see the phantom37 she had conjured107 up, and it wore the likeness108 of herself.
With an ominous109 chill creeping through her blood, and a growing tumult110 in her mind, she thought, "I must go," but still stood motionless, leaning over the wide gulf111, eager to see where that dead thing would pass away. So plainly did she see it, so peaceful was the white face, so full of rest the folded hands, so strangely like, and yet unlike, herself, that she seemed to lose her identity, and wondered which was the real and which the imaginary Christie. Lower and lower she bent112; looser and looser grew her hold upon the pillar; faster and faster beat the pulses in her temples, and the rush of some blind impulse was swiftly coming on, when a hand seized and caught her back.
For an instant every thing grew black before her eyes, and the earth seemed to slip away from underneath113 her feet. Then she was herself again, and found that she was sitting on a pile of lumber, with her head uncovered, and a woman's arm about her.
THE RESCUE.
"Was I going to drown myself?" she asked, slowly, with a fancy that she had been dreaming frightfully, and some one had wakened her.
"You were most gone; but I came in time, thank God! O Christie! don't you know me?"
Ah! no fear of that; for with one bewildered look, one glad cry of recognition, Christie found her friend again, and was gathered close to Rachel's heart.
"My dear, my dear, what drove you to it? Tell me all, and let me help you in your trouble, as you helped me in mine," she said, as she tenderly laid the poor, white face upon her breast, and wrapped her shawl about the trembling figure clinging to her with such passionate114 delight.
"I have been ill; I worked too hard; I'm not myself to-night. I owe money. People disappoint and worry me; and I was so worn out, and weak, and wicked, I think I meant to take my life."
"No, dear; it was not you that meant to do it, but the weakness and the trouble that bewildered you. Forget it all, and rest a little, safe with me; then we'll talk again."
Rachel spoke soothingly115, for Christie shivered and sighed as if her own thoughts frightened her. For a moment they sat silent, while the mist trailed its white shroud116 above them, as if death had paused to beckon117 a tired child away, but, finding her so gently cradled on a warm, human heart, had relented and passed on, leaving no waif but the broken oar for the river to carry toward the sea.
"Tell me about yourself, Rachel. Where have you been so long? I 've looked and waited for you ever since the second little note you sent me on last Christinas; but you never came."
"I've been away, dear heart, hard at work in another city, larger and wickeder than this. I tried to get work here, that I might be near you; but that cruel Cotton always found me out; and I was so afraid I should get desperate that I went away where I was not known. There it came into my mind to do for others more wretched than I what you had done for me. God put the thought into my heart, and He helped me in my work, for it has prospered118 wonderfully. All this year I have been busy with it, and almost happy; for I felt that your love made me strong to do it, and that, in time, I might grow good enough to be your friend."
"See what I am, Rachel, and never say that any more!"
"Hush119, my poor dear, and let me talk. You are not able to do any thing, but rest, and listen. I knew how many poor souls went wrong when the devil tempted them; and I gave all my strength to saving those who were going the way I went. I had no fear, no shame to overcome, for I was one of them. They would listen to me, for I knew what I spoke; they could believe in salvation120, for I was saved; they did not feel so outcast and forlorn when I told them you had taken me into your innocent arms, and loved me like a sister. With every one I helped my power increased, and I felt as if I had washed away a little of my own great sin. O Christie! never think it's time to die till you are called; for the Lord leaves us till we have done our work, and never sends more sin and sorrow than we can bear and be the better for, if we hold fast by Him."
So beautiful and brave she looked, so full of strength and yet of meek121 submission122 was her voice, that Christie's heart was thrilled; for it was plain that Rachel had learned how to distil123 balm from the bitterness of life, and, groping in the mire79 to save lost souls, had found her own salvation there.
"Show me how to grow pious124, strong, and useful, as you are," she said. "I am all wrong, and feel as if I never could get right again, for I haven't energy enough to care what becomes of me."
"I know the state, Christie: I've been through it all! but when I stood where you stand now, there was no hand to pull me back, and I fell into a blacker river than this underneath our feet. Thank God, I came in time to save you from either death!"
"How did you find me?" asked Christie, when she had echoed in her heart the thanksgiving that came with such fervor125 from the other's lips.
"I passed you on the bridge. I did not see your face, but you stood leaning there so wearily, and looking down into the water, as I used to look, that I wanted to speak, but did not; and I went on to comfort a poor girl who is dying yonder. Something turned me back, however; and when I saw you down here I knew why I was sent. You were almost gone, but I kept you; and when I had you in my arms I knew you, though it nearly broke my heart to find you here. Now, dear, come home.
"Home! ah, Rachel, I've got no home, and for want of one I shall be lost!"
The lament126 that broke from her was more pathetic than the tears that streamed down, hot and heavy, melting from her heart the frost of her despair. Her friend let her weep, knowing well the worth of tears, and while Christie sobbed127 herself quiet, Rachel took thought for her as tenderly as any mother.
When she had heard the story of Christie's troubles, she stood up as if inspired with a happy thought, and stretching both hands to her friend, said, with an air of cheerful assurance most comforting to see:
"I'll take care of you; come with me, my poor Christie, and I'll give you a home, very humble41, but honest and happy."
"With you, Rachel?"
"No, dear, I must go back to my work, and you are not fit for that. Neither must you go again to your own room, because for you it is haunted, and the worst place you could be in. You want change, and I'll give you one. It will seem queer at first, but it is a wholesome128 place, and just what you need."
"I'll do any thing you tell me. I'm past thinking for myself to-night, and only want to be taken care of till I find strength and courage enough to stand alone," said Christie, rising slowly and looking about her with an aspect as helpless and hopeless as if the cloud of mist was a wall of iron.
Rachel put on her bonnet for her and wrapped her shawl about her, saying, in a tender voice, that warmed the other's heart:
"Close by lives a dear, good woman who often befriends such as you and I. She will take you in without a question, and love to do it, for she is the most hospitable129 soul I know. Just tell her you want work, that I sent you, and there will be no trouble. Then, when you know her a little, confide76 in her, and you will never come to such a pass as this again. Keep up your heart, dear; I'll not leave you till you are safe."
So cheerily she spoke, so confident she looked, that the lost expression passed from Christie's face, and hand in hand they went away together, - two types of the sad sisterhood standing on either shore of the dark river that is spanned by a Bridge of Sighs.
Rachel led her friend toward the city, and, coming to the mechanics' quarter, stopped before the door of a small, old house.
"Just knock, say 'Rachel sent me,' and you'll find yourself at home."
"Stay with me, or let me go with you. I can't lose you again, for I need you very much," pleaded Christie, clinging to her friend.
"Not so much as that poor girl dying all alone. She's waiting for me, and I must go. But I'll write soon; and remember, Christie, I shall feel as if I had only paid a very little of my debt if you go back to the sad old life, and lose your faith and hope again. God bless and keep you, and when we meet next time let me find a happier face than this."
Rachel kissed it with her heart on her lips, smiled her brave sweet smile, and vanished in the mist.
Pausing a moment to collect herself, Christie recollected130 that she had not asked the name of the new friend whose help she was about to ask. A little sign on the door caught her eye, and, bending down, she managed to read by the dim light of the street lamp these words:
Too tired to care whether a laundress or a lady took her in, she knocked timidly, and, while she waited for an answer to her summons, stood listening to the noises within.
A swashing sound as of water was audible, likewise a scuffling as of flying feet; some one clapped hands, and a voice said, warningly, "Into your beds this instant minute or I'll come to you! Andrew Jackson, give Gusty132 a boost; Ann Lizy, don't you tech Wash's feet to tickle133 'em. Set pretty in the tub, Victory, dear, while ma sees who's rappin'."
"C. WILKINS, CLEAR STARCHER."
Then heavy footsteps approached, the door opened wide, and a large woman appeared, with fuzzy red hair, no front teeth, and a plump, clean face, brightly illuminated134 by the lamp she carried.
"If you please, Rachel sent me. She thought you might be able" -
Christie got no further, for C. Wilkins put out a strong bare arm, still damp, and gently drew her in, saying, with the same motherly tone as when addressing her children, "Come right in, dear, and don't mind the clutter135 things is in. I'm givin' the children their Sat'day scrubbin', and they will slop and kite 'round, no matter ef I do spank136 'em."
Talking all the way in such an easy, comfortable voice that Christie felt as if she must have heard it before, Mrs. Wilkins led her unexpected guest into a small kitchen, smelling suggestively of soap-suds and warm flat-irons. In the middle of this apartment was a large tub; in the tub a chubby137 child sat, sucking a sponge and staring calmly at the new-comer with a pair of big blue eyes, while little drops shone in the yellow curls and on the rosy138 shoulders.
"How pretty!" cried Christie, seeing nothing else and stopping short to admire this innocent little Venus rising from the sea.
"So she is! Ma's darlin' lamb! and ketehin' her death a cold this blessed minnit. Set right down, my dear, and tuck your wet feet into the oven. I'll have a dish o' tea for you in less 'n no time; and while it's drawin' I'll clap Victory Adelaide into her bed."
Christie sank into a shabby but most hospitable old chair, dropped her bonnet on the floor, put her feet in the oven, and, leaning back, watched Mrs. Wilkins wipe the baby as if she had come for that especial purpose. As Rachel predicted, she found herself, at home at once, and presently was startled to hear a laugh from her own lips when several children in red and yellow flannel139 night-gowns darted140 like meteors across the open doorway141 of an adjoining room, with whoops142 and howls, bursts of laughter, and antics of all sorts.
How pleasant it was; that plain room, with no ornaments143 but the happy faces, no elegance144, but cleanliness, no wealth, but hospitality and lots of love. This latter blessing145 gave the place its charm, for, though Mrs. Wilkins threatened to take her infants' noses off if they got out of bed again, or "put 'em in the kettle and bile 'em" they evidently knew no fear, but gambolled146 all the nearer to her for the threat; and she beamed upon them with such maternal147 tenderness and pride that her homely148 face grew beautiful in Christie's eyes.
When the baby was bundled up in a blanket and about to be set down before the stove to simmer a trifle before being put to bed, Christie held out her arms, saying with an irresistible149 longing33 in her eyes and voice:
"Let me hold her! I love babies dearly, and it seems as if it would do me more good than quarts of tea to cuddle her, if she'll let me."
"There now, that's real sensible; and mother's bird'll set along with you as good as a kitten. Toast her tootsies wal, for she's croupy, and I have to be extra choice of her."
"How good it feels!" sighed Christie, half devouring150 the warm and rosy little bunch in her lap, while baby lay back luxuriously151, spreading her pink toes to the pleasant warmth and smiling sleepily up in the hungry face that hung over her.
Mrs. Wilkins's quick eyes saw it all, and she said to herself, in the closet, as she cut bread and rattled152 down a cup and saucer:
"That's what she wants, poor creeter; I'll let her have a right nice time, and warm and feed and chirk her up, and then I'll see what's to be done for her. She ain't one of the common sort, and goodness only knows what Rachel sent her here for. She's poor and sick, but she ain't bad. I can tell that by her face, and she's the sort I like to help. It's a mercy I ain't eat my supper, so she can have that bit of meat and the pie."
Putting a tray on the little table, the good soul set forth153 all she had to give, and offered it with such hospitable warmth that Christie ate and drank with unaccustomed appetite, finishing off deliciously with a kiss from baby before she was borne away by her mother to the back bedroom, where peace soon reigned154.
"Now let me tell you who I am, and how I came to you in such an unceremonious way," began Christie, when her hostess returned and found her warmed, refreshed, and composed by a woman's three best comforters, - kind words, a baby, and a cup of tea.
"'Pears to me, dear, I wouldn't rile myself up by telling any werryments to-night, but git right warm inter7 bed, and have a good long sleep," said Mrs. Wilkins, without a ray of curiosity in her wholesome red face.
"But you don't know any thing about me, and I may be the worst woman in the world," cried Christie, anxious to prove herself worthy155 of such confidence.
"I know that you want takin' care of, child, or Rachel wouldn't a sent you. Ef I can help any one, I don't want no introduction; and ef you be the wust woman in the world (which you ain't), I wouldn't shet my door on you, for then you'd need a lift more'n you do now."
Christie could only put out her hand, and mutely thank her new friend with full eyes.
"You're fairly tuckered out, you poor soul, so you jest come right up chamber and let me tuck you up, else you'll be down sick. It ain't a mite156 of inconvenience; the room is kep for company, and it's all ready, even to a clean night-cap. I'm goin' to clap this warm flat to your feet when you're fixed157; it's amazin' comfortin' and keeps your head cool."
Up they went to a tidy little chamber, and Christie found herself laid down to rest none too soon, for she was quite worn out. Sleep began to steal over her the moment her head touched the pillow, in spite of the much beruffled cap which Mrs. Wilkins put on with visible pride in its stiffly crimped borders. She was dimly conscious of a kind hand tucking her up, a comfortable voice purring over her, and, best of all, a motherly good-night kiss, then the weary world faded quite away and she was at rest.
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1
sincerity
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| n.真诚，诚意；真实 | |
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superstition
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| n.迷信，迷信行为 | |
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creed
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| n.信条；信念，纲领 | |
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creeds
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| （尤指宗教）信条，教条( creed的名词复数 ) | |
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theatrical
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| adj.剧场的，演戏的；做戏似的，做作的 | |
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machinery
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| n.(总称)机械，机器；机构 | |
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inter
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| v.埋葬 | |
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strife
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| n.争吵，冲突，倾轧，竞争 | |
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boundless
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| adj.无限的；无边无际的；巨大的 | |
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10
paternal
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| adj.父亲的，像父亲的，父系的，父方的 | |
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despondently
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| adv.沮丧地，意志消沉地 | |
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12
wrath
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| n.愤怒，愤慨，暴怒 | |
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13
propitiated
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| v.劝解，抚慰，使息怒( propitiate的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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adorned
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| [计]被修饰的 | |
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15
idol
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| n.偶像，红人，宠儿 | |
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16
iniquities
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| n.邪恶( iniquity的名词复数 )；极不公正 | |
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17
alas
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| int.唉(表示悲伤、忧愁、恐惧等) | |
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18
earnings
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| n.工资收人；利润，利益，所得 | |
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19
stint
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| v.节省，限制，停止；n.舍不得化，节约，限制；连续不断的一段时间从事某件事 | |
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20
rebellious
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| adj.造反的，反抗的，难控制的 | |
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21
preyed
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| v.掠食( prey的过去式和过去分词 )；掠食；折磨；（人）靠欺诈为生 | |
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22
pauper
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| n.贫民，被救济者，穷人 | |
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23
odds
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| n.让步，机率，可能性，比率；胜败优劣之别 | |
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dependence
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| n.依靠，依赖；信任，信赖；隶属 | |
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25
oar
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| n.桨，橹，划手；v.划行 | |
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labor
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| n.劳动，努力，工作，劳工；分娩；vi.劳动，努力，苦干；vt.详细分析；麻烦 | |
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27
pangs
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| 突然的剧痛( pang的名词复数 )； 悲痛 | |
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isolation
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| n.隔离，孤立，分解，分离 | |
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29
genial
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| adj.亲切的，和蔼的，愉快的，脾气好的 | |
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30
conscientious
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| adj.审慎正直的，认真的，本着良心的 | |
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31
habitual
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| adj.习惯性的；通常的，惯常的 | |
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longings
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| 渴望，盼望( longing的名词复数 ) | |
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longing
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| n.（for）渴望 | |
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feverish
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| adj.发烧的，狂热的，兴奋的 | |
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spectral
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| adj.幽灵的，鬼魂的 | |
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phantoms
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| n.鬼怪，幽灵( phantom的名词复数 ) | |
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phantom
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| n.幻影，虚位，幽灵；adj.错觉的，幻影的，幽灵的 | |
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38
dreary
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| adj.令人沮丧的，沉闷的，单调乏味的 | |
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delusion
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| n.谬见，欺骗，幻觉，迷惑 | |
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40
insanity
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| n.疯狂，精神错乱；极端的愚蠢，荒唐 | |
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41
humble
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| adj.谦卑的，恭顺的；地位低下的；v.降低，贬低 | |
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42
utterly
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| adv.完全地，绝对地 | |
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twilight
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| n.暮光，黄昏；暮年，晚期，衰落时期 | |
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44
marketing
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| n.行销，在市场的买卖，买东西 | |
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45
unpaid
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| adj.未付款的，无报酬的 | |
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46
lessen
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| vt.减少，减轻；缩小 | |
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47
retrenchment
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| n.节省，删除 | |
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48
deferred
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| adj.延期的，缓召的v.拖延，延缓，推迟( defer的过去式和过去分词 )；服从某人的意愿，遵从 | |
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49
withheld
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| withhold过去式及过去分词 | |
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50
spoke
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| n.（车轮的）辐条；轮辐；破坏某人的计划；阻挠某人的行动 v.讲，谈（speak的过去式）；说；演说；从某种观点来说 | |
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51
elasticity
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| n.弹性，伸缩力 | |
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52
melancholy
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| n.忧郁，愁思；adj.令人感伤（沮丧）的，忧郁的 | |
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53
nervously
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| adv.神情激动地，不安地 | |
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54
bonnet
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| n.无边女帽；童帽 | |
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55
debtors
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| n.债务人，借方( debtor的名词复数 ) | |
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56
relentlessly
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| adv.不屈不挠地；残酷地；不间断 | |
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57
dreaded
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| adj.令人畏惧的；害怕的v.害怕，恐惧，担心( dread的过去式和过去分词) | |
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unduly
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| adv.过度地，不适当地 | |
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59
chamber
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| n.房间，寝室；会议厅；议院；会所 | |
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60
larceny
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| n.盗窃（罪） | |
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61
incapable
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| adj.无能力的，不能做某事的 | |
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62
aggravating
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| adj.恼人的，讨厌的 | |
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63
sniff
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| vi.嗅…味道；抽鼻涕；对嗤之以鼻，蔑视 | |
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64
tingling
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| v.有刺痛感( tingle的现在分词 ) | |
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65
irritation
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| n.激怒，恼怒，生气 | |
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66
hood
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| n.头巾，兜帽，覆盖；v.罩上，以头巾覆盖 | |
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67
linen
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| n.亚麻布，亚麻线，亚麻制品；adj.亚麻布制的，亚麻的 | |
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afterward
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| adv.后来；以后 | |
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possessed
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| adj.疯狂的；拥有的，占有的 | |
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70
killing
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| n.巨额利润；突然赚大钱，发大财 | |
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71
lavish
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| adj.无节制的；浪费的；vt.慷慨地给予，挥霍 | |
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72
generosity
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| n.大度，慷慨，慷慨的行为 | |
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73
harry
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| vt.掠夺，蹂躏，使苦恼 | |
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gratis
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| adj.免费的 | |
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75
scuttle
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| v.急赶，疾走，逃避；n.天窗；舷窗 | |
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76
confide
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| v.向某人吐露秘密 | |
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confidentially
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| ad.秘密地，悄悄地 | |
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78
exquisite
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| adj.精美的；敏锐的；剧烈的，感觉强烈的 | |
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79
mire
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| n.泥沼，泥泞；v.使...陷于泥泞，使...陷入困境 | |
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80
grievance
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| n.怨愤，气恼，委屈 | |
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81
berating
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| v.严厉责备，痛斥( berate的现在分词 ) | |
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82
mingle
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| vt.使混合，使相混；vi.混合起来；相交往 | |
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83
mingled
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| 混合，混入( mingle的过去式和过去分词 )； 混进，与…交往[联系] | |
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84
accosted
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| v.走过去跟…讲话( accost的过去式和过去分词 )；跟…搭讪；（乞丐等）上前向…乞讨；（妓女等）勾搭 | |
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85
benevolent
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| adj.仁慈的，乐善好施的 | |
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86
tempted
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| v.怂恿（某人）干不正当的事；冒…的险（tempt的过去分词） | |
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87
drizzle
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| v.下毛毛雨；n.毛毛雨，蒙蒙细雨 | |
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88
chilly
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| adj.凉快的，寒冷的 | |
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89
catching
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| adj.易传染的，有魅力的，迷人的，接住 | |
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savory
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| adj.风味极佳的，可口的，味香的 | |
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91
standing
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| n.持续，地位；adj.永久的，不动的，直立的，不流动的 | |
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92
wring
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| n.扭绞；v.拧，绞出，扭 | |
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93
desolate
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| adj.荒凉的，荒芜的；孤独的，凄凉的；v.使荒芜，使孤寂 | |
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94
miserable
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| adj.悲惨的，痛苦的；可怜的，糟糕的 | |
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sodden
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| adj.浑身湿透的；v.使浸透；使呆头呆脑 | |
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clog
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| vt.塞满，阻塞；n.[常pl.]木屐 | |
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importunate
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| adj.强求的；纠缠不休的 | |
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98
harass
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| vt.使烦恼，折磨，骚扰 | |
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99
lumber
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| n.木材，木料；v.以破旧东西堆满；伐木；笨重移动 | |
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100
wharf
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| n.码头，停泊处 | |
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101
sluggishly
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| adv.懒惰地；缓慢地 | |
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102
perilous
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| adj.危险的，冒险的 | |
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103
fascination
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| n.令人着迷的事物，魅力，迷恋 | |
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104
throbbing
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| a. 跳动的,悸动的 | |
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105
awesome
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| adj.令人惊叹的，难得吓人的，很好的 | |
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106
dilated
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| adj.加宽的，扩大的v.（使某物）扩大，膨胀，张大( dilate的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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107
conjured
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| 用魔术变出( conjure的过去式和过去分词 )； 祈求，恳求； 变戏法； （变魔术般地） 使…出现 | |
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108
likeness
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| n.相像，相似（之处） | |
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109
ominous
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| adj.不祥的，不吉的，预兆的，预示的 | |
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110
tumult
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| n.喧哗；激动，混乱；吵闹 | |
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111
gulf
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| n.海湾；深渊，鸿沟；分歧，隔阂 | |
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112
bent
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| n.爱好，癖好；adj.弯的；决心的，一心的 | |
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113
underneath
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| adj.在...下面，在...底下；adv.在下面 | |
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114
passionate
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| adj.热情的，热烈的，激昂的，易动情的，易怒的，性情暴躁的 | |
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115
soothingly
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| adv.抚慰地，安慰地；镇痛地 | |
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116
shroud
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| n.裹尸布，寿衣；罩，幕；vt.覆盖，隐藏 | |
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117
beckon
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| v.(以点头或打手势)向...示意，召唤 | |
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118
prospered
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| 成功，兴旺( prosper的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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119
hush
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| int.嘘，别出声；n.沉默，静寂；v.使安静 | |
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120
salvation
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| n.（尤指基督）救世，超度，拯救，解困 | |
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121
meek
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| adj.温顺的，逆来顺受的 | |
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122
submission
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| n.服从，投降；温顺，谦虚；提出 | |
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123
distil
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| vt.蒸馏；提取…的精华，精选出 | |
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124
pious
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| adj.虔诚的；道貌岸然的 | |
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125
fervor
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| n.热诚；热心；炽热 | |
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126
lament
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| n.悲叹，悔恨，恸哭；v.哀悼，悔恨，悲叹 | |
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127
sobbed
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| 哭泣，啜泣( sob的过去式和过去分词 )； 哭诉，呜咽地说 | |
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128
wholesome
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| adj.适合；卫生的；有益健康的；显示身心健康的 | |
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129
hospitable
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| adj.好客的；宽容的；有利的，适宜的 | |
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130
recollected
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| adj.冷静的；镇定的；被回忆起的；沉思默想的v.记起，想起( recollect的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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131
starcher
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| 搜索者，检查官 | |
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132
gusty
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| adj.起大风的 | |
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133
tickle
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| v.搔痒，胳肢；使高兴；发痒；n.搔痒，发痒 | |
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134
illuminated
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| adj.被照明的；受启迪的 | |
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135
clutter
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| n.零乱，杂乱；vt.弄乱，把…弄得杂乱 | |
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136
spank
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| v.打，拍打(在屁股上) | |
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137
chubby
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| adj.丰满的，圆胖的 | |
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138
rosy
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| adj.美好的，乐观的，玫瑰色的 | |
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139
flannel
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| n.法兰绒；法兰绒衣服 | |
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140
darted
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| v.投掷，投射( dart的过去式和过去分词 )；向前冲，飞奔 | |
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141
doorway
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| n.门口，(喻)入门；门路，途径 | |
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142
whoops
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| int.呼喊声 | |
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143
ornaments
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| n.装饰( ornament的名词复数 )；点缀；装饰品；首饰v.装饰，点缀，美化( ornament的第三人称单数 ) | |
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144
elegance
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| n.优雅；优美，雅致；精致，巧妙 | |
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145
blessing
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| n.祈神赐福；祷告；祝福，祝愿 | |
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146
gambolled
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| v.蹦跳，跳跃，嬉戏( gambol的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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147
maternal
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| adj.母亲的，母亲般的，母系的，母方的 | |
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148
homely
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| adj.家常的，简朴的；不漂亮的 | |
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149
irresistible
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| adj.非常诱人的，无法拒绝的，无法抗拒的 | |
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150
devouring
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| 吞没( devour的现在分词 )； 耗尽； 津津有味地看； 狼吞虎咽地吃光 | |
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151
luxuriously
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| adv.奢侈地，豪华地 | |
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152
rattled
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| 慌乱的，恼火的 | |
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153
forth
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| adv.向前；向外，往外 | |
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154
reigned
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| vi.当政，统治（reign的过去式形式） | |
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155
worthy
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| adj.(of)值得的，配得上的；有价值的 | |
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156
mite
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| n.极小的东西；小铜币 | |
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fixed
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| adj.固定的，不变的，准备好的；(计算机)固定的 | |
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