from "Apricots Died Young"

by Chiao Meng Translated by David Hinton

    Apricots died young in blossoms still nipples. Frost cut them free， and their scattering¹ made me

    mourn the child I had long ago，

    so I wrote this poem.

    Don't fondle these pearls.  O hands of ice，

    fondle pearls and they're quick to fly.

    And don't cut spring short， sudden frost.

    Cut spring short and that blaze of beauty's lost.

    Still nipples， tiny blossoms fall in tatters

    tinged² pure as a child's robes long ago.

    I gather them， never filling my hands，

    and at dusk， grief empty， return home.

    It must be this same thread of tears

    piercing the hearts of spring trees：

    before blossoms opened anywhere，

    flake³ after flake fell to the blade.

    Spring's life never lasts， it's true，

    but my lament⁴ over frost is already

    impossibly deep.  Instead of blossoms

    bathing streams， tears bathe robes.

    At our son's birth， the moon was dark，

    and when he died， it began to shine.

    Moon and child， they stole each other

    away.  O scarcely lived child of mine，

    what's it like， blossom after blossom，

    if not endless blue heavens in lament，

    sweetness falling into earthen dust，

    nothing left to bloom in other times？

    Calamity⁵ infecting a child is natural：

    blossoms mostly fail.  Still， I gather

    ruins of the heart， a spent old man

    cradling love's debris⁶ in endless night.

    What can be said once sound dies away？

    And once hope's dead， song's useless.

    Old and sick——no child， no grandchild，

    I stand like bundled firewood， alone.