Silent Love from a Quiet Dad　无言的父爱

　　Silent¹ Love from a Quiet Dad　无言的父爱

　　◎ Adam

　　Many years ago, a baby boy came into this world. But unfortunately, he didn’t come with a cry,which was a big problem from the medical point of view. The doctor, tough and quick, turned thebaby upside² down and slapped³ his bottom sharply⁴. The baby cried, and he survived. At thatmoment, the father yelled⁵ at the doctor, “Why did you hit my baby?” He did not realize that thedoctor had saved the baby’s life. The baby cried and cried, and the father smiled and silently⁶ criedas well. He held the baby in his arms and did not allow the doctor to touch the baby anymore.

　　Contest chair, ladies and gentlemen, that baby was me, and that man was my dad. Whenever mymom told people this story, I would always laugh aloud, and my dad would just shake his headand smile quietly.

　　Dad never tried to hug or kiss me when I was a child. And of course, he never said “I love you” tome, either. Maybe it’s a Chinese cultural thing, or maybe that’s the way my dad was. Butwhenever I felt defeated, sad or lonely, dad was always there. Dad was a man of few words, but Ialways liked to talk to him, and I could always feel a very special connection to him.

　　As I got older, I had a huge crush⁷ on a girl. She was tall and beautiful, with long hair. One day, Iwalked up to her and blurted⁸ out, “You are so beautiful baby. I love you so much. Please be mywife!” She was afraid and ran away with tears in her eyes. She told my teacher, and my teacherwas so angry that she made me stay after school, and called my dad to take me home. My first lovewas over, and that year I was 7 years old.

　　On the way home, dad was very quiet. It seemed that nothing had happened. Finally I broke thesilence and asked him, “Daddy, did I do something wrong?” Dad paused⁹ for a while as he alwaysdid and said quietly, “Son, you did nothing wrong, except that it’s too early for you topursuegirls.” “Daddy, do you think I could marry a tall and beautiful girl with long hair when Igrow up?” I asked. Dad gave me one of his rare¹⁰ laughs and said, “Of course you could. You are sohandsome! Just like your handsome father.” For the first time, I realized that dad had a sense ofhumor, although he was always quiet.

　　When I was in high school, dad retired¹¹ and set up a food stand on the street near my school. Dadwas very good at making fried¹² noodles, and a lot of people liked his noodles. Every day when Ifinished school, my classmates and I would pass his food stand. But I really hated talking to dad infront of his food stand, because I did not want my classmates to know that my dad was sellingnoodles on the street!

　　One night, I couldn’t stand it any more and shouted, “Dad, could you stop selling your stupidnoodles? I don’t need a father who sells noodles on the street!” At that moment, dad was shocked.

　　He tried to say something but didn’t. When he turned his head away, something happened that Ihad never seen and would never forget for the rest of my life. His eyes were filled with tears andsadness. It was the first time that I saw dad crying. My mom later told me that dad was sellingnoodles to save money for my college education. I was such an idiot¹³, and even today I still feelguilty for that night.

　　Time really flies. I finished college and then left my home city. For the past ten years, wheneverI’ve visited home, dad was always there meeting me and seeing me off quietly at the railwaystation. Whenever he saw me off, he never tried to hug me or touch me, although I alwaysexpected a father’s hug. When I was away from home, dad never wrote or called me, but healways pushed my mom to call me. Whenever mom was calling me, dad would sit beside her witha list of questions. He would instruct mom to talk to me for him. That’s the way dad is, and that’show dad shows his love to me.

　　I was married three years ago. Dad was very happy for me. And now he likes to tell people that hisdaughter-in-law is tall and beautiful, with long hair.

　　Dad is still quiet, but I still feel a connection. Ladies and gentlemen, when a connection is deepand powerful¹⁴, it lives in a place far beyond words, and it becomes something special—“a silentfather’s love”.

　　很多年前，一个男婴来到了这个世界。但遗憾的是，他没有“呱呱落地”，从医学角度来说，这是一个很大的问题！好在医生当时反应很快，也很强悍，一下子把男婴倒提起来，对着屁股一阵狂打。男婴终于哭了，脱离了生命危险。在那一刻，父亲对着医生吼道：“你为什么打我的孩子啊？”他并没有意识到医生救了这孩子的命。男婴不停地哭着闹着，这位父亲面带微笑，默默地流着幸福的眼泪。他把婴儿紧紧地抱在怀里，再也没有让医生碰一下。

　　大会主持人，女士们先生们，那个婴儿就是我，那个男人就是我老爸。每当妈妈告诉别人这个故事时，我总会放声大笑，而老爸则一边摇头一边默默地微笑。

　　在我很小的时候，老爸从来不抱我，也从来不亲吻我。当然，他也从来不说“我爱你”这三个字。也许这是中国文化的问题，也许老爸就是这种人。但每当我受挫，伤心或孤独无助时，老爸总会在那里。他话不多，但我总喜欢有什么话都对他说，我总能感到和他之间那种无法言喻的特殊关系。

　　等大一些的时候，我疯狂地爱上了一个女孩子。她又高又漂亮，还有一头长发。有一天，我终于忍不住了，走到她面前脱口而出：“亲爱的，你太漂亮了！我太爱你了！请你做我老婆吧！”没想到她被吓坏了，抹着眼泪跑开了，然后就告诉了老师。老师很生气，放学后没让我回家，并给老爸打电话，让他过来领人。我的初恋就这样夭折了，那年我7岁。

　　回家的路上，老爸非常沉默，好像什么事都没发生。最后我打破了沉默，问道：“爸爸，我做错什么了吗？”和往常一样，老爸沉默了一下，平静地说道：“儿子，你没做错什么，只是你这个年龄追女孩子还太早。”“爸爸，你觉得我长大了以后，能娶一个又高又漂亮，头发很长的老婆吗？”我又问道。老爸听了，难得地大笑了一下，说：“当然能了！你那么帅！跟你老爸一样帅！”我第一次感觉到，老爸虽然话不多，但还是有幽默感的。

　　等我上高中的时候，老爸退休了，在离我学校不远的街边摆起了面摊儿。老爸很擅长做炒面，当时很多人都很喜欢他做的面。每天放学回家，我和同学们都要路过老爸的面摊。但那时候，我真的不喜欢站在小吃摊前和他说话，因为我不想让同学们知道我有一个在大街上摆摊卖面条的老爸。

　　一天晚上，我再也忍不住了，朝老爸吼道：“爸爸，你能不能不再去卖面条？我不需要一个在大街上卖面条的父亲！”在那一刻，老爸惊呆了。他想要说点什么，但最终没有说。当他扭过头的时候，发生了一件事，我还从来没有见过这样的状况，我想我一辈子也不会忘记。他的眼里充满了泪水和哀伤。这是我第一次看到老爸流泪。后来妈妈告诉我，老爸摆摊卖面条是在为我上大学攒学费。我简直是个白痴！即使今天，我仍然为那天晚上的所作所为而感到内疚。

　　时间飞逝。大学毕业后我就离开了我的家乡。在过去的十年中，每当我回老家，老爸总会默默地在火车站接我然后再送我。每当他在车站送我时，他从来不会拥抱我，也从来不会碰我一下，虽然我总是期待他能抱我一下。当我远在他乡时，老爸从来不写信给我，也从来不给我打电话。但他总是会催妈妈给我打电话。每当妈妈给我打电话时，老爸就会坐在她身边，准备好一系列问题，然后让妈妈帮他传话。老爸就是这样的，这就是他表达爱的方式。

　　三年前我结婚了，老爸很为我感到高兴。现在他喜欢告诉别人，他的儿媳妇又高又漂亮，还留着一头长发。

　　老爸还是话不多，但我仍能感到和他之间的那种特殊的密切关系。女士们，先生们，当这种关系变得如此深厚，如此强烈时，它会根植于某处，再也无法用语言表达；它会变成一种特殊的情感——“无言的父爱”。

 

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