Question and answer jokes

时间：2007-01-17 08:17:45

（单词翻译:单击）

Q: What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in wet cement? A: Not enough cement. Q: Did you hear they just released a new Barbie doll called "Divorced Barbie"?
A: Yeah, it comes with half of Ken's things and alimony.

Q: What's the problem with lawyer jokes?
A: Lawyer's don't think they're funny, and no one else thinks they're jokes.

Q: How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Fifty four. Eight to argue, one to get a continuance, one to object, one to demur1, two to research precedents2, one to dictate3 a letter, one to stipulate4, five to turn in their time cards, one to depose5, one to write interrogatories, two to settle, one to order a secretary to change the bulb, and twenty-eight to bill for professional services.

Q: Where can you find a good lawyer?
A: In the cemetery6.

Q: Where can you find a good lawyer?
A: At the city morgue.

Q: What's the difference between a porcupine7 and a Mercedes Benz full of lawyers?
A: The porcupine has pricks8 on the outside.

分享到：


点击收听单词发音收听单词发音  

1 demur xmfzb     
v．表示异议，反对
参考例句：
  • Without demur, they joined the party in my rooms. 他们没有推辞就到我的屋里一起聚餐了。
  • He accepted the criticism without demur. 他毫无异议地接受了批评。
2 precedents 822d1685d50ee9bc7c3ee15a208b4a7e     
引用单元； 范例( precedent的名词复数 )； 先前出现的事例； 前例； 先例
参考例句：
  • There is no lack of precedents in this connection. 不乏先例。
  • He copied after bad precedents. 他仿效恶例。
3 dictate fvGxN     
v.口授；(使)听写；指令，指示，命令
参考例句：
  • It took him a long time to dictate this letter.口述这封信花了他很长时间。
  • What right have you to dictate to others?你有什么资格向别人发号施令？
4 stipulate shhyP     
vt.规定，（作为条件）讲定，保证
参考例句：
  • International rules stipulate the number of foreign entrants.国际规则规定了外国参赛者的人数。
  • Some manufacturers stipulate the price at which their goods are to be sold.有些制造商规定出售他们生产的商品的价格。
5 depose bw6x5     
vt.免职；宣誓作证
参考例句：
  • The witness is going to depose.证人即将宣誓做证。
  • The emperor attempted to depose the Pope.皇帝企图废黜教皇。
6 cemetery ur9z7     
n.坟墓，墓地，坟场
参考例句：
  • He was buried in the cemetery.他被葬在公墓。
  • His remains were interred in the cemetery.他的遗体葬在墓地。
7 porcupine 61Wzs     
n.豪猪， 箭猪
参考例句：
  • A porcupine is covered with prickles.箭猪身上长满了刺。
  • There is a philosophy parable,call philosophy of porcupine.有一个哲学寓言，叫豪猪的哲学。
8 pricks 20f8a636f609ce805ce271cee734ba10     
刺痛( prick的名词复数 )； 刺孔； 刺痕； 植物的刺
参考例句：
  • My skin pricks sometimes. 我的皮肤有时感到刺痛。
  • You must obey the rule. It is useless for you to kick against the pricks. 你必须遵守规定，对抗对你是无益的。

©2005-2010英文阅读网